Tuesday, 9 February 2021

Alrightgames: Maze – Solve the World's Most Challenging Puzzle

Christopher Manson, Maze: Solve the World's Most Challenging Puzzle

1985 / Cryptic gamebook / 96 pages / USA

*****

Masquerade and the other vintage armchair treasure hunts generally come off too poncy and smart-arse to be worth the effort, but this nightmarish labyrinth gamebook is enigmatic and sinister (classic clue) enough to obsess over in all its cross-hatched gloom. Until I get stuck in another loop and start wedging my fingers in pages. I mean, rooms.

I'm fairly confident I've got the first door sussed. The rest will take some time. I'm looking forward to trying to initiate my daughter into the cult. I wonder what the fish... okay, I just got it.

Sunday, 7 February 2021

Babyliography VI: The Undiscovered Country

Jan Pieńkowski, Numbers

1974 / Hardback / 32 pages / Poland

**

I was supposed to curb the spending this year, but then I got tempted by another bulk buying offer and wasted the coveted final seat on yet another 1–10 counting book, because I thought it would pair nicely with the Wheels book. The sacrifices we make for OCD.


Jan Pieńkowski, Wheels

1991 / Hardback / 32 pages / Poland

*

The better half of the Meg and Mog partnership also drew some books about things. This is one of those. I was expecting a bit more than an illustrated vocab list, though I'm not sure why.


Judith Kerr, The Adventures of Mog

1993 collection / Hardback / 112 pages / UK

***

I had Mog and the Baby (collected herein), and remembered it with vague nostalgic fondness, but I was never as into it as she is. "Bebby" is the current go-to nappy-changing story, as she relates to its anonymous antagonist. She'll go nuts for Baby's Day Out.


Neil Gaiman and Adam Rex, Chu's Day

2013 / Hardback / 30 pages / UK/USA

***

It's a bit early to creep her out with Coraline (though her cousin was obsessed with the film when she wasn't much older), but this interactive sneezalong was a fast favourite. Neil's put in the work to earn his celebrity children's author retirement more than most.


Unknown, Teletubbies: Pocket Library

2013 / Board books / 48 pages / UK

**

There's plenty of time to bury the classics in crap merchandise (I think we had an entire shelf of TV annuals growing up), but like the wobbly toys, I hoped these could make substitutes for the episodes since she started requesting "teh, teh, teh" a bit too often. I don't blame her, I was a bit obsessed with them when they came out, and I was in double figures. The back covers cobble together into a jigsaw like her Mr. Men set, so I'll retroactively dock those a star for redundancy.

Friday, 5 February 2021

Alrightmusic: January

John Butt, Bach: Mass in B Minor

1991 / Ebook / 128 pages / USA

**

Summarising the state of scholarship on the elusive, impractical mass c.1991, this didn't succeed in illuminating Bach's wonders more than other things I've read, and some of those tried a lot harder. If you can graph it out symmetrically, it must be good, right?


Thomas Sipe, Beethoven: Eroica Symphony

1998 / Ebook / 160 pages / UK

**

There's no chance of conjuring your own connotations after you've been bombarded with the composer's politics and the corresponding history of interpretations. The last chapter finally gets around to the music and attempts some vaguer themes, but it's already been ruined.


Stephen E. Hefling, Mahler: Das Lied Von Der Erde

2000 / Ebook / 176 pages / USA

***

Whether the font was smaller or he just had more worth writing about as he drew links across the symphography, this seemed more substantial than these usually are, even without the unnecessary chapter-length digression on reception.


Peter Hill, Stravinsky: The Rite of Spring

2000 / Ebook / 184 pages / UK

***

Such a comprehensive look at the polarising ballet, its origins, form and behind-the-scenes and before-the-pit drama that it's a shame I'm not obsessed with it, really.


Paul Everett, Vivaldi: The Four Seasons and Other Concertos, Op. 8

1996 / Ebook / 120 pages / Ireland

***

A brief overview to kick off independent study of the well-loved concept album and its accompanying, less overplayed, but similarly digestible themed works. Along with some less interesting abstract ones to skip.


Wednesday, 3 February 2021

Alrightfilms: January

Dudley Andrew and Carole Cavanaugh, Sanshô Dayû

1999 / Ebook / 79 pages / USA

***

BFI books permit authors to peter out at a pathetic page count when they ran out of things to say, but this one smartly splits the assignment between scholars who bring different expertise to the dissection of a grim folk tale. I favoured the musings on mathematical framing over the history and politics.


Scott Anthony, Night Mail

2007 / Ebook / 97 pages / UK

**

Excessive postmortem of a vintage Post Office propaganda piece (evidently more detailed than many proper films are worth), though I could probably wax similarly tedious about some of my favourite adverts, if tasked with writing the book on the early-90s CIC Video Star Trek VHS trailer or something.


Simon Louvish, It's a Gift

1994 / Ebook / 96 pages / UK

*

A brief biography of W. C. Fields, whom we're presumably supposed to be bowled over by as he pratfalls between laboured comedy skits, these recapped verbatim and illustrated by page-using screencaps, because there's just not that much to say, really.


Joan Mellen, Modern Times

2006 / Ebook / 88 pages / USA

***

The tramp and his most serious silliness are examined in their crazy context. The standard scene by scene breakdown is more justified when they're near-silent vignettes. Complete with deleted scenes and archive talking heads, this is all you could ask from a worthwhile documentary.


Paul Hammond, L'Âge d'or

1998 / Ebook / 76 pages / UK

**

I hadn't made it far into this nonsense nightmare without a walkthrough. He provides the background and clarifies the visual foreign puns and other elusive things, but a person who's so enthusiastic about this shit isn't someone you really want to spend even a stingy page count with.

Monday, 1 February 2021

On the Omnibuses: January


Various, The Norton Anthology of English Literature: Sixth Edition, Volume 
2

Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1785–1833) ***

Variably enrapturing laudanum-fuelled nightmares, paeans to nature and guilty defences of idleness, concluding with some boring criticism I didn't read because I don't have to write essays any more.

Alfred, Lord Tennyson (1830–92) **

Thematically all over the shop, pinned down by stubborn rhyme and meter that comes off as a patient challenge. I didn't make it through the Camelot faff.



William Shakespeare, The Illustrated Stratford Shakespeare

The Tempest (1610–11) ***

Touted as The Bard's grand, fantastical, malleabllegorical finale, I still don't get what all the fuss is about. Forbidden Planet did it better.

The Two Gentlemen of Verona (1594) **

Dull courtly love pentangle, brightened by some really laboured jokes that could be mistaken for an exaggerated pisstake. There were some nice rhymes, which is the sort of enthusiastic note I make when forced to listen to rap.

The Merry Wives of Windsor (1600) *

Blackadder's putdown to Baldrick that he'd laugh at a Shakespeare comedy frequently came to mind as I endured this mirth-free pantomime of a horny rascal getting his comeuppance, with bonus funny foreign accents. Even the fans don't like this one.

Measure for Measure (1604) **

This early-17th-century #MeToo drama is less problematic than expected, but it still takes about four acts longer than necessary to make its straightforward point.

The Comedy of Errors (1589) ****

Actually recognisable as a comedy and actually funny as contrived confusions and identity crises pass the absurd threshold. Better than Beckett, though I may have been swayed by the phantom laugh track of Elizabethans wetting their breeches.



Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Original Illustrated Strand Sherlock Holmes

The Sign of the Four (1890) **

Technically a superior sequel, I suppose, but the more laid-back padding made it feel more stretched out than its predecessor's gratuitous double feature, and not really deserving of the length. Its more intimate stakes for Watson could also be considered a plus, but feels off in light of all the episodic jumping around we're going to do. Basically, it's just a bit weird to do the movies before the show.

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (189192) *****

Tied with Paradise Lost for the number of versions owned over the years, a miniaturised facsimile of the first two collections was my go-to plane book for a few years, but it's luxurious to have these full-sized in a coffee table book to pore over with morning coffee.

Physically and thematically lighter than the novels, the Adventures are generally more enjoyable as a result, and Holmes' aloof arrogance now comes off as a funny character flaw rather than borderline insufferable. Plenty of classics, but 'The Red-Headed League' was always a favourite for its incredible overcomplication, and it's always refreshing when they get out to the country.



Arthur C. Clarke, Four Great SF Novels

The City and the Stars (1956) ****

Your standard hero's quest turned star trek in an inspired far future setting that's so far down the line, and its machinations conveniently mysterious, that it doesn't come off as dated.

I expect one of those streaming services will mount their own pointless adaptation of it one of these days, rather than having to come up with their own stories.

Saturday, 30 January 2021

Alrightreads: Art Books II

Michael Kerrigan and artists, Asian Art

2005 / Paperback / 384 pages / Various

**

The first quarter's good, before scenic paintings make way for boring crockery and trinkets. If I'd wanted a book of landscape scrolls, I probably should have been more specific than an overview of the entire artistic output of the world's largest continent.


Tamsin Pickeral and artists, Turner, Whistler, Monet

2005 / Paperback / 384 pages / UK/USA/France

****

An insightful and inspirational tour with a trinity I hadn't thought to group, travelling the impressionistic purgatory between serene romanticism and grim modernism with ace light effects.


Tamsin Pickeral and Vincent van Gogh, Van Gogh

2007 / Paperback / 384 pages / UK/Netherlands

***

Impressive multi-angle obsessing, even if I would've preferred another contrived comparison of similar artists to explore the connections and vex the snobs.


Joseph-Emile Muller and Hieronymus Bosch, Bosch

1976 / Hardback / 116 pages / Luxembourg/Netherlands

***

A brief biography and insubstantial analysis to read once, before most of the book is rightly given over to repetitive, mad dioramas. Turns out I don't like Bosch as much as I used to, but I still want that jigsaw.


Wiesław Banach and Zdzisław Beksiński, Beksiński. Malarstwo/Painting

2014 / Hardback / 64 pages / Poland

****

I'd lusted after a Beksiński book since he became my favourite weird/dark artist as a teen. I could have treated myself to more than a basic, budget release, but there's still plenty of good stuff here, in miniature.


Thursday, 28 January 2021

Alrightreads: Are You Local?

Carole Sexton, Tales of Old Cheshire

1995 / Paperback / 96 pages / UK

**

We're not the most famous county down/up here (you don't even know where it is, do you?), so these local histories and fables aren't the most original or compelling. It's all about the novelty of seeing those familiar place names legitimised in (cheap) print. Reusing the same cover art across counties is especially cheap. They probably assumed that local loyalty meant it wouldn't ever come up, but I saw it.


Julia Skinner, Cheshire: A Miscellany

2012 / Hardback / 64 pages / UK

***

A brief data burst of local knowledge for visitors, newcomers or people who grew up in the county but spent most of that time playing on the Amiga. They might be making some of it up for a laugh, I can't tell, me yed's all of a missock.


Paul Hurley, Nantwich History Tour

2017 / Paperback / 96 pages / UK

***

A roughly linear walk from Acton through the town centre to just past my house, this isn't necessary trivia, but it's satisfying to put names and stories to what would otherwise have been background architecture so I can feel more connected to my new home from the onset, and I'll get to appear casually omniscient when I hand the knowledge down.


Nick Lambert, Cheshire Walks with Children : Circular Walks for Parents and Children

1996 / Paperback / 190 pages / UK

****

A quarter-century's vintage will no doubt lead to some confusion when we get out and about, but these places probably don't change all that much. Though if I do get us lost and they have to send out the helicopters, this will be why. He includes routes for buggies, so there's no excuse to dawdle.


John McIlwain, Chester City Break: More Than a Guide

2009 / Paperback / 104 pages / UK

****

I'm not sure how this transcends the horizons of a guide, unless it's by comparison to the 12-page Pitkin guide you'd get for the same price, but there's enough timeless information outside of the inevitably hopelessly obsolete business directory to make this indispensable on our first family outing to the nearest city worth visiting. When we're actually allowed.


Tuesday, 26 January 2021

Alrightgames: Ascension – Immortal Heroes

Ascension: Immortal Heroes

2012 / Deckbuilding card game expansion / 1-2 players (+) / USA

***

I wouldn't have bought this expansion if it hadn't been on oddly-specific sale. Luckily, the main set it pairs with was also going comparatively cheap second-hand, so I didn't have to see how awkwardly this blended with my Apprentice starter pack after all.

Since I'd always play these Year Two sets together on the app, there's a lot of comforting familiarity here, and I would've had a nagging sense of something missing without it (the twinge that remains is presumably the associated, overpowered promos). But with all those ubiquitous base cards 'helpfully' making it playable out of the box, and an extraordinary amount of cards dedicated solely to triggering another type of card, 50% off feels entirely appropriate.

Sunday, 24 January 2021

Alrightgames: Ascension – Storm of Souls

Ascension: Storm of Souls

2011 / Deckbuilding card game / 1-4 players (+) / USA

*****


I hadn't expected to invest in a proper Ascension set so soon when I bought a cheapo starter off Amazon, but then I reunited with eBay. I don't have the budget or the shelf space to buy too many big box games, but if I don't take the chance to fill those gaps when something worthy comes along, it's only going to end up getting claimed by bloody Monopoly again, God help us.

One nice thing about this game is that each release cycle is fairly self-contained, and mixing multiple sets together mainly serves to muddy things, so you're not compelled to subscribe to increasingly desperate supplements, unless you get bored. For its aesthetics and mechanics, this was my preferred iteration of the digital deckbuilder, so when I saw the big box and its expansion going comparatively cheap*, I indulged myself. (The baby got a play kitchen, she's doing fine).

Two players would take a good while to cycle through this combined deck, and even longer when you're playing the ad-libbed solitaire rules for lonely people that makes a fairer fight than the AI ever was. If I do ever get bored of it, I can swap it out for another Ascension set to be sated by the slightly different features. Owning multiple sets would show a disappointing lack of imagination.

* A £20 limit has kept the likes of Dominion tantalisingly out of my clutches so far.

Friday, 22 January 2021

Alrightgames: Cluedo

Cluedo

1949 (1995 edition) / Mystery board game / 3-6 players / USA

****


My childhood happened to happen at the tail end of the original(ish) version of Cluedo before the major 1996 update, so naturally I have to resort to eBay to avoid any of that modern muck ('Dr Orchid?' Fuck off!)

I'm aware that this pointless punctiliousness will only make it harder for my daughter to track down her own set of acceptable nostalgic vintage if she has children. I wonder how far I can pass these neuroses down.

While playing against a computer streamlined Scrabble and made Monopoly actually bearable, I never got to grips with virtual Cluedo, which was either doing some alien American rules or maybe the proper rules as opposed to whatever I grew up with. Now that I've adopted some other family's heirloom, we'll play it how we bloody want.