Babyliography CCXLI

David Alderton, My Little Book of Cats and Kittens

2017 / Library book / 64 pages

**

A confusingly-titled large-format book of cat breeds, if you're into eugenics.

Dr. Seuss, The Sneetches and Other Stories

1961 / Library book / 65 pages

****

Some nice, silly, inconsistently meaningful stories that she was motivated to read again by herself afterwards. She's six, I can probably stop pointing that out now.

Unknown, Incredible YouTube Records and Fantastic Feats

2025 / Library book / 96 pages

**

It's quite a feat to make a book like this so uninteresting, but we didn't find anything worth following up.

Dr. Seuss, Marvin K. Mooney Will You Please Go Now!

1972 / Library book / 64 pages

***

I think I've been Marvin K. at times.

Dana Simpson, Unicorn Time Machine: Another Phoebe and Her Unicorn Adventure

Collected 2024 / Paperback / 176 pages

***

Some good gags and typically mundane time travel. We've almost caught up to the present with these collections and will run out of new ones soon, but we can loop around again while waiting.

Apology

A few months ago, I reacted badly to inconsistent design choices on the spines of a children's book series. I now recognise that I overreacted and it wasn't such a big deal after all, so I would like to apologise for my outburst and unacceptable language.

Now it looks like this:

Alrightreads: Sunny Day, Sweeping the Bodies Away

R. L. Stine, Fear Street: The New Girl

1989 / Audiobook / 168 pages

***

Having a growing child is the perfect excuse to be theoretically testing out these juvenile junk treats on her behalf, but it's more about escaping back to the 20th century when all you had to worry about was homework and ghosts.

R. L. Stine, Fear Street: The Surprise Party

1989 / Ebook / 168 pages

***

A nicely convoluted High School Gothic detective story with shades of Twin Peaks and Dark Shadows before a Second Amendment finale. I could get into this series.

R. L. Stine, Fear Street: The Overnight

1989 / Audiobook / 160 pages

**

We take a premature break from Fear Street and its disproportionately murderous and paranormal residents for an overnight trip to... what's the name of the place we're sending the kids to? "Fear Island?" Sounds totally fine and non-foreboding.

R. L. Stine, Fear Street: Missing

1990 / Ebook / 168 pages

***

The occult rears its bejewelled monkey head, and it's pretty goofy. Referencing characters from other books in the background helps with the world-building, as long as he remembers which ones he's killed.

R. L. Stine, Fear Street: The Wrong Number

1990 / Audiobook / 165 pages

**

Like much shlock horror, this peaks at the cover, which tells you everything you need to know. The following 165 pages are superfluous, but at least we learn the mundane origin of the street's name.

Alrightgames: Takenoko – Chibis

Takenoko: Chibis

2015 / Board game expansion / 2-4 players

***

The irresistible family theme would have made this an essential add-on to the tug-of-bamboo if I hadn't adopted a pre-loved bundle in the first place. It's slightly disappointing that the baby pandas are only represented by dull tokens rather than more figurines, and that the mum doesn't do anything except pump out babies, but kicking bamboo production into overdrive almost makes up for it.

Per the expansion credo, this overcomplicates the game a bit more than necessary in some areas, especially for a young player, but we don't have to include everything.

Alrightgames: Some Call of Kilforth expansions

Some Call of Kilforth expansions

I could have bought more expansion packs designed for the game I actually have rather than the seafaring sequel I don't, but one option is expensive and elusive while the other was going cheap and was a tempting call to mock up a clunky semi-DIY lite version of Call of Kilforth much more affordably than buying the game itself. The theme is piracy, after all.

Deluxe Upgrades ***

These decadent sets would be an unjustifiable indulgence at full price and if I was just getting bigger or alternate versions of things I already have, but at a clearance price it was an affordable way to get the new location cards and figures for the sexy new characters and less sexy enemies (whose stats I've jotted down, along with the sagas, night cards and everything). It also handily includes all the extra dice and stands that should have been in the standard boxes in the first place. Any missing components I borrowed from other games.

Ventures ***

These extra cards work fine as the standard cards when their slim decks are padded out with some more generic Gloom. Dice-randomised locations and other minor tweaks make them compatible across games, though treating 'Ocean' and 'Badlands' as synonymous location types is a bit of a stretch. They're not that damp.

Alrightgames: Rebis expansions

The Matchbox Collection: Rebis expansions

Like nearly all of the mini expansions in the collection, these were designed strictly for the two-player mode, meaning that solo players have to leave them to rot in the matchbox alongside the useless red gem token. I wasn't having that and I use them anyway, even just as placeholders.

Elixir **

Tidies up the tokens in the two-player mode (tidying up is a preoccupation in this game) by giving them homes that later give someone a bonus. I use them as more attractive automa shelves, ignoring the icons.

Zero **

I hadn't realised the number 0 cards were officially a "mini expansion" when they came as part of the main deck. They don't work in the solo game. I use them for my starting shelf and when drawing an extra face down card to close a shelf, which extends the game slightly and presumably breaks the maths.

Rebis Solo: Ruby Variant (Fan Variant) ***

An unofficial variant that finds a use for the red gem in solo play and makes so much sense that I don't know why it wasn't there originally. Not that I actually manage to reach the gem in practice, but it's nice to see it, and it helps to track where I'm up to.

Alrightgames: Rebis

The Matchbox Collection: Rebis

2020 / Card game / 1-4 players

***

Sorting books isn't the most appealing theme, magical or not, and this is mainly a basic maths session, culminating with scoring and more tidying as you turn all the flipped cards back around ready for the next exciting round. It was a disappointment after the dramatic Eiyo, but it's been a grower. It's probably better as a two-player competition where you get to use all the cards and tokens than as a limited and repetitive solitaire activity, but I doubt anyone else will be boring enough to play it with me.

Alrightgames: Anthelion expansions

Anthelion expansions

Resold

Button Shy's 18-card wallet games can be masterclasses in streamlining highly efficient and replayable games. Other times, like this, they simply leave out all the other cards that you'd normally expect to give the game some variety and that would encourage you to play more than a couple of times. I wouldn't have bought the game without the bundled expansion packs, but they gave me reasons to play it for a while before passing it on.

Faction Packs ***

Five small card packs that expand the roster of characters and home worlds with themed attitudes and abilities to add modular variety one game at a time and encourage you to actually play the thing. It would have been more interesting if some of them had been designed to replace the primary factions rather than just the neutral rogue faction each time, but that wouldn't work without some editing. I could throw in everything to make a 10-planet Meganthelion, but I suspect it would be very dull.

Black Hole solo variant ***

This wasn't the most satisfying game to play against myself, but the creator brainstormed a few ideas for solo challenges and I kept being pulled back to this literally unwinnable scenario for its cold simplicity – trying to selectively save as many 'valuable' people as possible before they're swallowed up and sending less fortunate souls down its maw for bonuses.

Alrightgames: Anthelion – Conclave of Power

Anthelion: Conclave of Power

2019 / Tactical card game / 2 players

***

Resold

Elaborate space tug-of-war to pass a few minutes if you want something a bit more cerebral than Star Realms and you're too quirky for chess. Well, it's not that elaborate at just 18 cards, but the faction packs sort that out and are really necessary for making it feel like more than a demo.

Alrightgames: Dream On (DIY)

Dream On (DIY)

2017 / Storytelling/memory card game / 2-8 players

****

Another school break, another storytelling game that's easy and even preferable to mock up using superior Dixit cards rather than needlessly buying it. It's friendly and cooperative like Muse, but this time as a memory game. I'm not sure how long the egg timer's supposed to last, but we turn it over again to give us more time to forget the stupid names the other player came up with. I provided appropriate tokens, but it was immediately clear that scoring didn't matter.

Alrightgames: 7 Wonders Duel – Agora

7 Wonders Duel: Agora

2020 / Card drafting game expansion / 2 players

****

The more devious and grounded counterpart to the lofty Pantheon, I warmed to it quicker (the shiny cubes helped), though the new machinations are so dominant that there's a case for preferring vanilla. Like the other expansion, more to think about means there's more to worry about and be distracted by, and letting your guard down for a moment can mean a knife in your back. Or basic oversights like accidentally building 8 wonders.

Combining them all isn't too complicated once you're familiar with the rules, it's just extra hassle to set up.

Alrightgames: Monopoly Expansion – Go to Jail

Monopoly Expansion: Go to Jail

2025 / Board game expansion pack / 2-6 players

*

Do you like going to jail in Monopoly? Of course you do! Here's more of that!

This was the least appealing of the frivolous Monopoly expansion range, especially for playing with a child who I try not to be "mean" to even when we're playing fairly, and who I didn't really want seeing crime and corruption rewarded. This denial naturally made it the one she wanted the most. I let her trade in some unwanted stuff that was hogging shelf space, so her inevitable criminal career will be her own fault, don't blame me.

Unlike the other ludicrously lucrative expansions, this one didn't noticeably make the game faster as claimed, and no one even went to Super Jail where they stash the good cards. We quit when bedtime was approaching and boredom had long since set in.

It's more palatable when mixed in with the rest to play inadvisable Meganopoly, but it'd be better without.

Alrightgames: Carcassonne – Under the Big Top

Carcassonne: Under the Big Top

2017 / Tile placement board game expansion / 2-6 players

**

Resold

Never released in the old art style, this next-generation original wasn't on my radar at all until someone dumped their collection on eBay at prices too good to pass up for a big stack of tiles and wooden people with funny hats.

With more animal tokens and precariously balancing meeples, this is firmly in the category of completely unnecessary frills like all the later expansions, but this time the novelty wore off before the end and I got tired of seeing them come out. It was a memorable visit from the circus, but I don't need it to come again.

Alrightgames: Top Trumps Quiz – Safari Animals

Top Trumps Quiz: Safari Animals

2021 / Card game / 1+ players

**

I told her there were only going to be 30 questions with up to three multiple choices (two, as it turned out), which we'd quickly learn by trial and error like I did with that Amiga Trek Trivia Quiz. But she wanted to complete the set ("why is it Top Trumps?"), it's at least educational, and they're the cheapest games on eBay. Plus, she gets to feel good about beating my worldly knowledge most of the time.

Alrightgames: Atmosfear III – Anne de Chantraine, Witch

Atmosfear III: Anne de Chantraine, Witch

1992 / Video board game expansion / 3-6 players

**

Our next stop after the vampire was less impressive, and that bar was already quite low. Appointing selected players as her minions is a nice touch, but the multi-part spell cards and having to remember who's who (especially when you're two players doubling up in the first place) is all too distracting when you're already struggling to shift your pieces around the board before the next infernal interruption. I'm glad I tried it once though, and hope these characters don't show up in the six year old's nightmares.

Alrightgames: Fluxx

Fluxx

1997 (2008 version) / Card game / 2-4 players

***

I was introduced to this chaotic card game in a hostel on my first travel stop in 2010, while appropriately pissed, and found its unstable "rules" and lolR@Nd0mness hilarious in my debilitated state. It'll never be that enjoyable again, but it seemed like a good call for playing with a child who enjoys the similarly swinging futility of Monopoly's Buy Everything expansion when it was going cheap on eBay.

The Action cards are a bit wordy for a six year old who refuses adult assistance, but that doesn't stop her from generally winning after a few turns anyway by randomly matching the goal. It's not exactly the madcap party I remembered. Maybe we need to get pissed?

Alrightgames: Boss Monster – Tools of Hero Kind

Boss Monster: Tools of Hero Kind

2013 / Card game expansion / 2-4 players

***

This themed add-on rounds out the cardboard video game and makes it more interesting, challenging and amusing by giving the NPC Heroes familiar power-ups that translate well. It makes me root for those plucky little guys, even as I orchestrate their gruesome demises. It's just a shame they insisted on the quirky Game Boy packaging that's more than twice as large as it needs to be to store some cards you're going to mix into your other box anyway.

Alrightgames: Unfold – Through the Wall

Unfold: Through the Wall

2023 / Puzzle game demo / 1-5 players

*

Donated

I said I wouldn't buy any more cheap and nasty games based on price alone, but this envelope game combined a quirky gimmick with a minimalist footprint, so I figured it wouldn't do any harm to add it to the box of miscellaneous curiosities.

I was wrong. Of the three puzzles in this sub-Usborne adventure, one is a basic spatial puzzle and the others require telepathy or a lucky guess. This has no value.

Alrightgames: Star Realms – Frontiers Solo Challenges

Star Realms: Frontiers Solo Challenges

As a fan of solo games, it's strange that I've generally overlooked the solo mode of one of my long-time favourites. That's probably because playing proper Star Realms against myself is satisfying enough, and the ones I've tried didn't feel as satisfying as proper Star Realms, but maybe there's a more rewarding challenge lurking somewhere out there. And it's an excuse to play lots of Star Realms, even if it's not proper Star Realms.

Junior Gamesmaster: Missing Earth Ponies / Rescue Run / Crocodile Wedding

My Little Pony: Tails of Equestria – Missing Earth Ponies / Rescue Run / Crocodile Wedding

DIY roleplaying game adventures

Inspired by the one YouTube RPG playthrough we've ever collectively sat through to create her own stories from scratch, the six year old GM took our latest ponies out for another spin before making us prematurely replace them with more generically capable elemental superheroes and guiding us through encounters with monsters, creepy witches and friendly crocodiles, invariably culminating in feasts.

I've lost control forever now. I wonder whether she'll move us onto D&D or something more hardcore next? I hope she can help me understand the rules.

Babyliography CCXL

Clare Helen Welsh and Ángeles Peinador, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Recycle It

2022 / School book / 24 pages

**

The class' elected Eco Warrior learned how it undramatically works.

Samantha Montgomerie and Pedro Riquelme, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Mighty Mud Race

2022 / School book / 24 pages

*

Would my life be richer if someone had documented every individual Oxford Reading Tree and Ginn 360 book I went through? I don't imagine so, and yet still I do this for us.

Zanna Davidson and Nuno Alexandre Vieira, Fairy Unicorns: Islands in the Sky

2022 / Hardback / 112 pages

**

The grand finale of the series (probably). She thought she'd spoiled the ending by looking ahead to the pictures, but she doesn't know all the conventions yet.

Catherine Baker, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Welcome to My Home

2020 / School book / 24 pages

**

Some of the things some kids get up to in some countries, when they're not being terrible brats (presumably).

Scott Campbell, Cabin Head and Tree Head

2025 / Library book / 88 pages

**

Kinda weird, though not intriguing enough for us to carry on beyond the first skit.

Babyliography CCXXXIX

Steve Smallman and Ada Grey, Poo in the Zoo: Merry Poopmas!

2023 / Paperback / 32 pages

*

Scatological zoological magical festive special.

Trevor Barnes, World Faiths: Hinduism and Other Eastern Religions

2013 / Library book / 40 pages

**

The young theologian wanted to learn more about Hindus, Buddhists and... miscellaneous.

Erika Kari, Vampire Doll: Guilt-na-Zan, Volume 3

2007 / Library book / 200 pages

**

The earliest volume the library had in the manga the young reader insisted on prematurely borrowing was predictably confusing but not too extreme.

Suzy Senior and Monika Róża Wiśniewska, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Show Time!

2021 / School book / 24 pages

**

One of the more relatable alliterative microdramas.

Anna Claybourne, 100 Most Unexplained Mysteries on the Planet & Don't Read This Book Before Bed

2017 /  Library books / 256 pages

***

I'd give these a higher score for being right up my street if only they weren't so bogged down by all the old hoaxes. One of the books at least acknowledges the fakery while still giving it centre stage.

Aimee songs again

New York

New York, oooh, ho yeah

I love New York, it's such a nice place

It's so cool, yeah, I know

It's the best place ever

You know I'm at the back

Oh no, am going to the front

Chorus:

I love New York, it's the best place ever

It makes me feel so good, oh yeah

New New New New York

Oh, New New New York

New York, I would love to go there

I know it sounds crazy, but you got to understand things

So what

You know I'm at the back

Oh no, am going to the front

I love New York, it's the best place ever

It makes me feel so good, oh yeah

New New New New York

Oh, New New New York

I like New York, no matter what

So try to make it the best place ever

So maybe I'll change back

I love New York, it's the best place ever

It makes me feel so good, oh yeah

New New New New York

Oh, New New New York

Aaaaa

I love New York, it's the best place ever

It makes me feel so good, oh yeah

New New New New York

Oh, New New New York

New York

The Silliest Song Ever

Oo oo ooooooo oo

Ee ee eeeeeee

Foo foo foooooo

Doo doo doo?

This is the silliest song ever

No, Shaun, stop pecking me!

I'm so sorry about that, I just -

Shaun! I said stop! Shaun!

[Sigh]. So sorry about that.

This is the craziest song ever...

Oh, I need the toilet. Wait a sec.

[Flush]

Sorry. Let me go back to that.

This is the silliest song ever...

Oh, I'm itchy. Sorry about that.

This is the craziest song ever...

[Ring ring]

Yes? No.

This is the craziest song ever...

[Cough]

This is the craziest song ever...

Atchoo!

This is the craziest song ever...

Oh, um... yeah, just... go do it, then.

This is the craziest song ever...

Can you just wait, Marjorie?

This is the craziest song ever...

Marjorie!

This is the craziest song ever...

Poo poo! Stop! Go over there. That's why I called you that name, because you always poo in your pants.

This is the craziest song ever...

And that's why I'm saying:

Wee.

Alrightreads: Pan-demonium

Various, The Sixth Pan Book of Horror Stories

1931-65 (collected 1965) / Audiobook / 222 pages

***

I was expecting mouldy macabre tales, so the gorier and generally distressing ones caught me by surprise. I wouldn't have got through the dreary longer ones if they weren't being passively read to me on YouTube.

Faves: 'The Unforgiven,' 'No Flies on Frank,' 'My Little Man'

Various, The Seventh Pan Book of Horror Stories

1902-66 (collected 1966) / Audiobook / 239 pages

***

Mixes some then-vintage chillers with contemporary gross-outs and humdrum encounters with unknowable entities.

Faves: 'The Monkey's Paw,' 'The Last Experiment,' 'The Island of Regrets'

Various, The Eighth Pan Book of Horror Stories

1945-67 (collected 1967) / Audiobook / 236 pages

***

Notably shorter and snappier, often literally. I've stopped paying as much attention, to be honest, except when there's a jarring historical or disturbed child.

Faves: 'Playtime,' 'The Bean-nighe,' 'The Brindle Bull Terrier'

Various, The Ninth Pan Book of Horror Stories

1947-68 (collected 1968) / Audiobook / 252 pages

****

More surprisingly vicious and graphic yarns from before they were allowed to show that shit in films.

Faves: 'The Fly,' 'Thou Shalt Not Suffer a Witch,' 'Old Feet'

Various, The Tenth Pan Book of Horror Stories

1958-69 (collected 1969) / Audiobook / 236 pages

**

A distinctly pervier and sexist batch at the end of the decade, maybe they'd worn out the good writers by now.

Faves: 'The Necklace,' 'The Fat Thing,' 'Magical Mystery Trip'

Alrightgames: Sushi Go Party!

Sushi Go Party!

2016 / Card game / 2-8 players

*****

A premature impulse purchase when the six year old went briefly crazy for the original game for about a day over Christmas, it went straight into indefinite storage until such time as she got re-obsessed and demanded more sushi or when we just needed something new to do, which turned to be the next half term break.

The equivalent of an unlocked game-of-the-year edition of the card game, this bigger box replaces the original in every way except portability, which wasn't enough to keep it from being eBayed. The new dishes are quick to learn and varied enough to reignite her interest for a while, at least. I mean, it's no Sailor Moon Monopoly or Monster High: Share or Scare.