Alrightreads: Tartarusaurus

Sarban, The Sound of His Horn

1952 / Audiobook / 154 pages

****

I was expecting the pastoral occult respite of Ringstones again. so the inhuman body horror caught me off guard. One of those certified classics I'm not in a rush to read again.

John Gale, A Damask of the Dead

1991-2002 (collected 2002) / Ebook / 100 pages

****

This ornate prose poetry is just what a boutique press is made for. I'd have appreciated it more if I had any romance in my soul or a nose for perfume, but there was still plenty of sorcery, spooky castles 'n' shit.

Faves: 'The City on the Farthest Shore of a Sable Lake,' 'The Old King's Prophecy: A Faery Tale,' 'A Damask of the Dead'

Arthur Machen, Ornaments in Jade

1897-1924 (collected 1924) / Ebook / 54 pages

****

The common thread of free-thinking misfits seeking occult pastoral solace makes this a nice little concept album, though that hardly distinguishes it from his others.

Faves: 'The Idealist,' 'The Ceremony,' 'Torture'

Christopher Blayre (Edward Heron-Allen), The Cheetah-Girl

1923 / Audiobook / 71 pages

**

Prescient genetic science fiction for the purposes of perving over a Thundercat.

Nicola Lombardi, The Gypsy Spiders and Other Tales of Italian Horror

2015-21 (collected 2021) / Audiobook / 276 pages

**

Blurred together too much to pick favourites.

Alrightgames: Battleship

Battleship

1931 / Pencil and paper game / 2 players

***

Hangman is still pen and paper king (or drawing tablet and stylus, get with it, grampa), but this might teach her grid references and deduction or something, plus it saves electricity. Impossible to play without lapsing into a William Sadler in Bill & Ted voice.

I explained it poorly the first time and she crammed each ship represented by multiple dots into single squares, no wonder they were elusive.

Alrightgames: Uno

Uno

1971 (modern edition) / Card game / 2-10 players

****

Bought years in advance, these cheap cards were used and abused for variably educational purposes until I finally convinced her to let us give the bland-looking game a try. Then she insisted on playing several dozen rounds until bedtime.

Fast and fun, especially when inevitably adding your own over-complications and foiling yourself, like her suggestion of alternating between saying "uno" or "one" each time it comes up, so you have to remember which one you said last time – inspired.

Alrightgames: Cluedo – Mrs White Goes Crazy (Fan Game)

Cluedo: Mrs White Goes Crazy (Fan Game)

Combat/survival board game / 2-6 players

**

The five-year-old suddenly became obsessed with Cluedo this week. Looking up home-brew variants to mix things up, Reddit user CoconutPete44's reminiscence of a survival horror perversion they played as a kid seemed too fun to resist, especially since my daughter had already taken a dislike to Mrs White. She's the Mr Mittens of people.

The rules sorted themselves out as we raced to stockpile variably useful weapons, and I threw in the unbalanced battle dice from Rhino Hero (all odds and all evens) to reward proactive bloodlust. Fun for all the family!

Alrightgames: Pokémon Snap

Pokémon Snap

1999 / Nintendo 64 game / 1 player

**

I remembered this being a limited but relaxing Pokémon game from when my brothers had it, and a nice alternative to the constant battles elsewhere. I didn't remember how useless the turn-of-the-century AI was at recognising Pokémon, making it an exercise in fruitless frustration, especially without an analogue stick.

Alrightgames: Whot! – Cute Animals

Whot!: Cute Animals

2021 / Matching card game / 2-4 players

**

A more basic Uno (which she still has no interest in playing) with cute animal pictures (that's the ticket). Limited, but decent for a Happy Meal freebie or 50p from a charity shop, with a blank card to add your own game-breaking creation.

Alrightgames: Super Mario 64

Super Mario 64

1996 / Nintendo 64 emulator game / 1 player

**

In 1996, I was contentedly a generation behind perfecting my Mario World save. This new-fangled 3D one is too hard; we quit on level 1. Kids played this?

Alrightgames: Aerial Adventure – Fulgash's Tower (Adapted)

Aerial Adventure: Fulgash's Tower (Adapted)

2002 / Roleplaying game adventure / 2+ players

****

This inspiring entry in Mike Mearls' Aerial Gazetteer (the flying tower's gone skew-whiff, so stay away from the windows!) gave just enough detail to get started building an adventure around, especially when the violence and innuendo are being neutralised for a young audience anyway.

The late, eponymous archwizard was recast as a plastic pony named Glitter who fortuitously survived the fall, though when I forgot to get rid of her before the party caught up with the runaway tower, it did dilute the exploration aspect somewhat. A few climbing tests, rescued bats, non-fatal window dives to retrieve lost boots and a successful spell later, and her vampire character now has a suitably gothic residence inconveniently plonked in the middle of the Everfree Forest to hang out in between adventures. Tune in next time for more classic D&D vandalism!

Alrightgames: Sylvion – Below Ground

Sylvion: Below Ground

2015 / Solo card game mini expansion / 1-2 players

***

The box is pretty full with cards as it is, but including this with the other expansions in the base game would have really rounded out the package and made it competitive with Onirim. Fortunately for us latecomers who don't want to pay inflated prices for imported rarities, it's another stack of cards that doesn't have to be seamlessly mixed into the deck, so printed scans or doodles can give you the gist.

It's a fun bit of added jeopardy, and may become essential in time like the other expansion and game modes designed to address the problem of the game being mathematically solvable.

Alrightgames: Sylvion expansions

Sylvion expansions

2015 / Solo/cooperative card game expansions / 1-2 players

Only two real expansions felt unavoidably meagre after being spoiled by Onirim, but they're both substantial and creative, and make a nice final phase to the modular base game that I wouldn't want to play without now. You couldn't fit much more in the box anyway.

Extraordinary Feats and Betrayal ****

More charming critters to lend a hand or fixate your entire strategy around to change things up. The Betrayal cards are only slightly troublesome, so mixing this in makes the game notably easier.

The Elements ****

Like the best Onirim expansions, these random atmospheric and geological events overcomplicate things in a great way, sometimes even making baddie cards good, and elevate an already solid theme to the next level. Extending the game to 20 rounds is a bit intimidating, but you've got this.

The Ravage! **

An extra hard mode if you get tired of winning. Make sure to also increase your penalties and draw fewer support troops each round if you think you're hard. Otherwise, you can display the little figurine on the shelf with the others and let your kid play with them carefully.

Who Goes There?: Castellion >

Alrightgames: Sylvion

Sylvion

2015 / Solo/cooperative card game / 1-2 players

*****

Urbion was a bit of a letdown, but this greater deviation from the formula won me over more than expected with its immersive theme (you can feel the heat when the elementals blaze), eccentricity (what's a whale doing in a forest? lol) and recreational stress.

Most people compare its tower defence approach to something called Plants vs Zombies, but my reference point is more Final Fantasy VII's Fort Condor minigame, because I'm from the '90s. Its soundtrack is the Theme from Sylvion now.

Babyliography CCVII

Sophy Henn, The Music in Me

2022 / Library book / 32 pages

**

If you mean feelings, say feelings.

Linda Chapman and Biz Hull, My Secret Unicorn: The Magic Spell

2002 / Paperback / 128 pages

***

No pressure to get through the whole boxset of bigger-girl chapter books I bought just because it seemed good value, but still good to have in our stable of magical horse bedtime stories.

Rob Lloyd Jones and Alessandra Santelli, Usborne Forgotten Fairy Tales: The Nettle Princess

2020 / Library book / 48 pages

***

Nice to read a new fairy tale, and some rare nettle representation too.

Fiona Undrill, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Odd Fish!

2020 / School book / 16 pages

***

The most educational of these so far, she wasn't even scared of the goblin shark.

Ben Clanton, The Greatest in the World: A Tater Tales Book

2023 / Library book / 80 pages

***

It's unlikely she would have given this spuddy series a try if it wasn't recognisably by the same creator as Narwhal and Jelly (which only scraped in itself through unicorn references), but it was slightly better than you might expect a graphic novel about three potatoes to be. We made separate predictions for the end twist and we were both right.

Babyliography CCVI

Catherine Baker and Angeles Peinador, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Rock Pools

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

The non-fiction ones are best, even if they insist on weird abbreviations no one uses.

Marvin Berglas, 110 Amazing Magic Tricks with Everyday Objects

2002 / Ebook / 42 pages

***

The same ones that are spammed everywhere, padded out by some shockingly poor ones.

Richard and Lewis Edwards-Middleton and Andy Passchier, My Family and Other Families

2022 / Library book / 32 pages

**

A list of family dynamics with a loosely-draped story. She won't be the only reader disappointed to find that they didn't make the search for the lost ticket a solvable puzzle.

Various, Read with Oxford: Stage 2 – Phonics – Dick Whittington and Other Tales

2018 / Library book / 80 pages

**

Dick Whittington was new to her. She hadn't been missing out.

Laura Hambleton, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Pink Boat, Pink Car

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

She liked the girl one best, because she was a girl.

Babyliography CCV

Jeremy Whitley, Tony Fleecs and Brenda Hickey, My Little Pony: Adventures in Friendship, Volume 4

2014-15 (collected 2015) / Hardback / 76 pages

**

She obviously didn't get all the pop culture references in the Discord story, but I never knew what the likes of Animaniacs were referencing either.

Mark Bradley, Bumble and Snug and the Angry Pirates

2021 / Library book / 160 pages

**

Should have left Bumble to them, mate.

Susan Frame and Valeria Issa, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: I Look for Mark

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

Not the most drawn-out hide and seek ever.

Susanna Leonard Hill and Mike Wohnoutka, Can't Sleep Without Sheep

2010 / School book / 32 pages

**

We debated whether the girl was ironically already asleep or just imagining it, and I think she was right.

Dana Simpson, Camping with Unicorns: Another Phoebe and Her Unicorn Adventure

2017 (collected 2020) / Paperback / 176 pages

***

Another summer comes and goes and more gags are outright repeated, but they're still her favourite bedtime stories.

Babyliography CCIV

Various, My Little Pony: Adventures in Friendship, Volume 3

2013-14 (collected 2015) / Hardback / 76 pages

***

Getting slightly obscure already by Volume 3, the pony princess balances out the rubbish dragon, and their unexpected team-up is a fun romp.

Sasha Morton, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Cubs

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

The bear cub eating the fish is the edgiest thing in this series so far.

Jessica Ellis and Parwinder Singh, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Finn Feels Better

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

Phase 3 appears indistinguishable from Phase 2 so far, but it makes her look good.

Unknown, Pokémon Early Reader: Legendary Ultra Beasts

2019 / Library book / 64 pages

**

I'm not sure why she insisted on this in the library, since she has no real interest in the show, but it was refreshing to have a good, old-fashioned boy story for a change. At least until we got to the end of what turned out to be an incomplete prelude episode. They also reuse the same screencap where it doesn't make sense, as if kids wouldn't notice.

Arina Tanemura, Disney Frozen II: The Manga

2021 / Library book / 160 pages

**

I refused to read her much of this pointless adaptation, which is hypocritical as someone who once owned the likes of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze equivalent, because I just couldn't be bothered. It was at least amusing to see the verbatim script suddenly giving way to seeming translation paraphrasing when it hit the copyrighted song lyrics.