Babyliography CCXXVI

Julia March, Rosie Peet and Victoria Taylor, The Amazing Book of My Little Pony

2017 / Hardback / 48 pages

**

An elaborate toy advert, luckily she got most of them for her fourth birthday already. It's Monster High now, granddad.

Roger Hargreaves, Little Miss Contrary

1984 / Library book / 32 pages

*

One of the less distinct concepts, I guess he'd run out of ideas now, especially as the story mainly revolves around established Mr Men.

Sarah Snashall and Alfredo Belli, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Harper and the Big Dog

2020 / School book / 16 pages

***

Painstakingly constructed alliteration and tricky trigraphs to catch early readers out, that's the spirit. The message might be helpful too, now that dogs are scary again.

Raina Telgemeier, Guts

2019 / Paperback / 144 pages

****

Mainly enjoyed as another instalment in her favourite tween drama, I thought this was going to be more about bodily functions than brain, so it was a bit more complex than the poo book expected, but was a helpful introduction to the idea of therapy.

Samantha Montgomerie and Elena Napoli, Collins Big Cat Phonics for Letters and Sounds: Spook Night

2021 / School book / 16 pages

**

These cartoon ghouls might have creeped her out a year ago, but she's got five Monster High dolls now.

The Smiling Balloon by Aimee

The Smiling Balloon

One day, a lady was just having breakfast. She had three pieces of toast with honey on them. She ate them all up.

She looked outside. There was nothing strange going on. All she saw was a duck toy that she never saw before. She didn't buy it. She never saw it. It was standing there.

The next morning, she looked out and she saw the duck toy again. It had moved from the spot where it was before.

The next day, she looked out and she saw the duck toy and a monkey toy.

The next day, she saw the duck toy, a monkey toy and a rabbit toy.

The next day, she saw the duck toy, a monkey toy, a rabbit toy and a bee toy.

Thw next day, she saw a Monster High toy lying down on the ground.

Every day, she saw something different in her garden. One day, when she was going in town, she saw her iPad on the ground. She picked it up and thought, 'I left it at home, I never bring that out.' She went home, she put it back.

She went back to the same spot and the iPad was there again. She went home and put it back.

She went back to the same spot, and it was still there again. She didn't pick it up, she went back home.

The iPad wasn't there, so it was the same iPad.

She saw the market in a different place where the toy shop was, and the toy shop where the market was. She didn't know what was going on. She asked some people, 'why did it move?' They said its always been like that.

She looked up in the sky. She saw grey clouds and rain coming down, but she didn't feel wet at all. She didn't have an umbrella, she didn't even have a coat, and everybody else got wet.

She looked up in the sky again. She saw a balloon with a smiley face on it, grinning at her.

She went back home, she was so confused, but this time the rain was coming inside her house, and outside it was sunny. She looked outside. The balloon was grinning at her. Soon enough, it was in her house. She popped it.

Then her breakfast that she had this morning suddenly appeared and it was night time in the middle of the night and she still saw that balloon grinning outside. And then she fainted.

We don't know why the balloon went inside her body.

Ranking the Bruce Dickinson albums

At the height of my Maiden mania, I was pleased to learn that Bruce Dickinson had solo albums (often involving other alumni too), but I hadn't realistically expected them to be as good as they were, sometimes far surpassing what the bigger band was doing at the same time. And other times, not so much. Here are my Top 7 Bruce Discs-inson.

Ranking Star Trek: The Next Generation season six

I saw most or all of these when they came around on BBC repeats in 1999, but I was more fixated on the ongoing spin-offs by that point, making these autumnal Enterprise treks feel less cosy and familiar than any previous run. They're on the wind-down now, but there are still a few late classics to compete with brash upstart Deep Space Nine.

Alrightreads: TV XXI

Nikki Stafford, Once Bitten: An Unofficial Guide to the World of Angel

2004 / Ebook / 440 pages

****

Snappy summaries and the most interesting trivia about every episode is all I needed. It's also padded out with less interesting time-capsule articles and a single season of Buffy to complete her previous book.

Mark Morris, Doctor Who: The Bodysnatchers

1998 / Audiobook / 280 pages

**

An unadventurous third outing for the literary Eighth Doctor, retreading a well-known story in an overfamiliar historical setting. What's the point?

Mike Tucker and Mat Irvine, BBC VFX: The Story of the BBC Visual Effects Department

2010 / Ebook / 240 pages

****

A celebration of creativity and explosions. Most of the programmes predate me, but this effectively channelled phantom nostalgia regardless.

Laura J. Burns and Melinda Metz, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Stake Your Destiny – Colony

2005 / Audiobook / 256 pages

***

The most long-winded prose sections and fewest choices I've ever seen in one of these makes it more firmly a story than a game, which was probably the right call. Some readers may also enjoy the second-person dysmorphia of being a magical high school girl.

Chris McDonnell, Rebecca Sugar and artists, Steven Universe: Art & Origins

2017 / Ebook / 240 pages

****

I was mainly here for the aesthetics, but it was interesting seeing how it all came together, while not letting on to future reveals.

Alrightgames: Sea Salt & Paper – Extra Pepper

Sea Salt & Paper: Extra Pepper

2025 / Card game expansion pack / 2-4 players

***

Randomised rule changes dished out as bonuses for losers and penalties for winners make things a bit more interesting, even if they're as variable in interest as the cards of the first expansion.

When the cards don't need to be mixed into the deck and printable images are widely available online, there isn't a lot of incentive for me to actually pay for something like this, but it's probably a DIY keeper anyway.

Alrightgames: Tails of Equestria – Flying High

My Little Pony: Tails of Equestria – Flying High

2017 / Roleplaying game mini-adventure / 2+ players

**

A sequence of flying challenges that amounted to chucking a few different dice several times in a row and pretending different things were happening, as is the simplistic beauty and limitation of the system. It was at least a reminder to follow up on neglected character development for Bubblegum from a whole year ago, who fortune favoured despite her slight handicap in stats.

Alrightgames: Kingdomino

Kingdomino

2016 / Tile placement board game / 2-4 players

****

Only one step up from Monster Dominoes, et al, so it doesn't have a lot to offer for a grown-up who's been spoiled by the likes of the Oniverse series, but the young player took to the recreational maths more enthusiastically than expected, always followed up with some storytime in the combined kingdoms. It's sort of serving as a superior junior Carcassonne to the one they actually sell, though she probably prefers the regular one.

Ranking the Oniverse games

No doubt like many Onirim enjoyers, I was tempted to check out other select games in its series and keep an eye out for offers in the future before I gave into temptation and bought the whole damned lot, courtesy of a reasonably priced eBay bundle. My preconceptions about which ones looked the most worthwhile weren't always accurate, but sometimes I could tell.

Do any of them live up to the original? Are they all too different, or not different enough? Shouldn't I have waited until Ultimion was out to do this? Yes.

8. Castellion

Tile Tetris has a tactile advantage, but it didn't worm its way into my mind or heart like most of the others did, as well as having the measliest serving of expansion (singular) in the whole series. I enjoyed the learning curve, as always (hang on... this 'bad' tile is just what I need!), and my five-year-old took a particular shine to it, so it's sticking around.

Preferred setup: Custom mish-mash for a child

7. Stellarion

After so many diverse and inventive variations on stock games, basically combining Onirim and Aerion was a bit disappointing (even considering how highly I rank those), making this the first game to feel a little superfluous in the line since Urbion. The add-ons are more essential than ever for expanding the limited universe of the base game, though the decks still feel a bit too tight, and with less randomness than some of the other titles, it can feel more like going through the celestial motions than having fun.

Preferred setup: Everything

6. Urbion

This OCD balancing act was a step lower when I'd only played the more limited first edition, but extra expansions and other small but substantial tweaks enhanced what was already an addictive challenge. It's still one of the less distinctive and immersive titles, but the quick setup means I feel like playing and losing to it more often than some of those higher up.

Preferred setup: All but the last two expansions

5. Nautilion

Another ingenious challenge with adorable characters and perhaps the most impeccable design of the series with all the different layouts, but I was disappointed that I didn't love this twist on the traditional board game more, having hyped it up in my mind the most. It almost got there once the expansions rounded it out, added the essential battle scene and saw all crew members pulling double shifts, but it's all a bit too fiddly to bother with often.

Preferred setup: Level 2 or 3 sub with three or four expansions

4. Sylvion

I was surprised at how much I loved this one, which seems to show up in auctions the most frequently and I'd hesitated over buying due to it looking a bit limited and repetitive. It is, but the theme's so well done that I'm fully involved in the struggle with my woodland comrades (and whales, for some reason) and don't mind doing the same thing most of the time. It's not the most replayable title though, and they could have piled more expansions on and not made us buy Below Ground separately.

Preferred setup: Everything

3. Aerion

The race to the top is a close one from here. This weird dice game quickly proved to be one of the most addictive in the series, with a smorgasbord of modular expansions bringing back the adventurous exploration of Onirim and creating a megagame that's similarly satisfying to beat. It's just a shame those expansions don't have more varied art. I'm reaching for superficial quibbles at this point.

Preferred setup: Everything

2. Cyberion

Not the most welcoming theme, but the first glimpse of the mechanical minions turned that around, even before the delights of the Babybots and Gigantobots. This feels like a late series entry in the best way, taking cues from its predecessors (the many decisions of Aerion, the battles from Nautilion, the cuddly critters from Sylvion after Doctor Robotnik's had his way with them) and putting them through its own rusty grinder. It's just a shame that some random permutations make it literally unplayable from the start.

Preferred setup: Everything except The Microbots, which are too annoying

1. Onirim

It was hyped as a modern classic solo card game before I even played it, but I was sold on the theme and artwork even before that, so the game being incredibly satisfying was a nice bonus. Working through all of the expansions and promos and mixing them together, it became cumulatively spectacular. Returning after playing all of its spin-offs, it still reigns supreme, though how much that's primacy bias, I can't say.

Preferred setup: Everything, though Happy Dreams and Dark Premonitions is a bitch

Now for the wait to discover whether the mysterious finale lives up to its arrogant title:

Alrightgames: Onirim – The Sphinx, the Diver and the Confusion

Onirim: The Sphinx, the Diver and the Confusion

2014 / Solo/cooperative card game mini expansion / 1-2 players

***

Rare, precious and almost completely unnecessary, this reserve Dream team showed up on eBay eventually (along with a legit copy of The Mirrors), allowing me to put the final toppings on an already overbaked cake.

I was going to review them individually, but there's not much to say, all being minor variations on existing Nightmare or Denizen cards with the customary give and take. This variety is nice for its own sake, but I wouldn't miss them.